Grief is the Price You Pay for Love

Grief is the journey of adjusting your life and moving on without the person you love and care deeply about. It is the person who has been with you throughout this journey called life. Your life has been profoundly affected by this individual. Since they are no longer here, it's your job to navigate without them. How can you do that when your heart won't let you let go?

Grief is an emotional roller coaster that you will always ride. There is no time limit or ending. It comes with many loops and sudden changes. It is impossible to comprehend that pain until you have experienced it yourself.

The loss of my grandmother one year ago is still fresh in my mind. Every day, I spoke with her. A typical day for me would involve at least four phone calls. My visits to her were sporadic. Since I valued my grandmother's opinion, I always consulted her before making any decisions or changes. She was always the first to know anything that happened. While I have many people to talk to and give me advice, talking to my grandmother is different.

My grandma offered me the best advice and helped me navigate some of the tenacious times in my life—things I wasn't comfortable sharing with others, I could share with her. She was like a diary. I never had to worry. As things happen throughout the day, I often think about calling her, but then I realize she's not here.

I continue to refer to her in the present tense when I talk about her. It's hard to believe that she isn't coming back. The range of emotions I experience in just one minute is overwhelming. At one moment, I might be calmly cooking, working, or handling daily tasks, and the next, I find myself lost in thought about my grandma. I reflect on the last conversation we had. When this happens, a flood of emotions fills my mind. Thinking about her throughout the day remains constant.

No matter how much time passes or what you do, the desire for one more chance with that person will never go away. Grief and love will always go hand in hand. Why; because grief is the price we pay for love. The love and how that person made you feel will never go away.

As I move forward, I will reflect on my grandma's impact. Her life was filled with good things, and I will forever be grateful to God for placing this wonderful gem in my life. The day she left and her birthday cannot be days of sorrow, but a celebration and reflection.

Forever Grateful,